si itay ang haciendero

ang pic n tinutukoy.. (posted with permission)

 

 

no smile for you

I used to post my blog entries at blogspot and that’s where i met him. We have very few things in common like reading books and writing stuff. That’s as far as i can remember. But we got along well and became friends. We txtd for some time, chat online and met at powerbooks. How geeky. I like the place anyway.

As promised, i brought some of my John Grisham novels to lend him. Actually, three. He also has books he wanted to lend me.

We went to starbucks and he treated me with my favorite frappe not because he’s nice and feeling gentleman but because he lost in a game we had before we met. We txtd all night long and whoever falls asleep first will pay for that starbucks drink. And of course, i won. =) i can still remember being sleepy at work that following morning.

Nweiz, so several months passed since the day we met. I still haven’t finished reading the books. We still exchanged txt msgs but not as often as it used to be. I was busy. He lost his fone. I changed my number. But we never completely lost communication. I met his “love” thru txt. He knew about the guy who gave me heartache and headache.

One day, he asked if we could meet and i said yes knowing that i had nothing to do. But I woke up late and told him only at that time that i wouldn’t make it. He was really upset. I would feel that way too. I don’t really do that to people because i hated being in that situation as well. But for some reason, i just didn’t wanna go. He told me he saved so much for that day so we can have something to eat because we only had coffee last time. And since i didn’t show up, he spent all of his money shopping for clothes, some stuff he probably needed, and some groceries if i remember it correctly.

Then i felt like things have changed. The way he talks to me.. prang may bitterness. May galit.  It could be just me. I could just be feeling guilty and interpreting things in a different way.

So when he asked to have his books back, i went out of my way to meet him and return the books. We went to starbucks (again) and saw the movie, Nancy Drew. Before we went our separate ways, i gave him his books back. But the books he handed to me.. one of it was not mine. I asked for my other book. He said he left it in his locker at work. Great. That’s the part i really did NOT like. And what do i do with the book i have now which is not mine and that i don’t think it was even his. I don’t want to have anything to do with it.

That was a long time ago. I don’t recall any of the things we talked about after the last time we met. I think we exchanged angry txt msgs but i don’t try to remember.

Then just recently, i opened my friendster and i saw him on the recently updated list. I viewed his profile and left a comment, “magandang umaga.”

He, in turn, commented, “so what’s with the all of a sudden reappearance?” and that was something i never expected as a reply.

I left another msg, “edi wag. salamat sa comment.”

Then today, i read the notification that someone sent me a smile. I opened to see the message:

leux wants to brighten your day with a smile. Check out leux's profile and send a reply.

A message from leux:

I was asking a question, not my fault if you misinterpreted it. I'm sorry. Di na naman ako nag-isip. I just tried to return the favor. I don't want you to feel ignored you know. even if that's what you've been doin...

so it was my fault? i absolutely misinterpreted it. and i may have intentionally been ignoring you. and that in-your-face thing.. that's it. i'm not going to reply anymore. and i'm definitely not sending you a smile.

sunday morning

one hell of a good morning. im supposed to be sleeping soundly and having the best sleep of the week but thanks to the "shit bid" i have to come to work today for interim sched. but i just woke up. and im so late coz my shift starts at 530am. haha! my head aches from too much (or less) drinking. im tempted not to leave the house anymore.. sigh.

..i'll be back to post pictures from last night.

360/656

yes.. i ranked 360th out of 656 agents on the floor.

ok, so i am somewhere in the middle. how it was done, i really don't know. if they based it on saf, fine. i had 2 call ins for january alone. so i guess i deserve to be on that place.

so how does one expect us to complete filling out this form needed for what i personally call "shit bid"?

there's not much to choose from. well, there are lots actually. but you just couldn't find something that's good enough.

you can either get 8x5 or 10x4 schedules.

i've tried doing 10x4 before and i can't make it through a day without sleeping during shift at one time or another.

so i would definitely go for any sched that's 8x5.

then again, there's no choice to make for a healthy schedule. you can either have split offs or consecutive restday but with sliding shifts.. like on some days your shift will start at 8am and on other days, it could be 8.30 or 9am.

and goodness.. shifts start as early as you can imagine.

i guess i'd go for sliding scheds. but i don't wanna have the shift i currently have.

this one where..

+ i should be in bed by 7pm or i won't wake up to make it on time for work the next day

+ i am always scared of going out alone in the dark of the dawn, endlessly waiting for a trike to pass by

+ i pay more for travel expenses than what im earning

+ i am extra scared for bringing my gadgets and money and other valuable stuff that might interest a "magnanakaw"

i hope i'll get a decent schedule and have, if not the same, new easy-to-get-along-with team8s, and of course a cool supervisor.

can i tell you i miss you?

i managed to keep my mouth shut. but that was really hard. i was afraid i would ruin the most wonderful nonsense conversation at that time. i was like a helpless kid who couldn't get what i want. and all i wanted to do was to tell him i miss him. i miss him a lot.